Chandler and Monica are probably the most adorable couple on Friends - taking things from a drunk one-night stand at a wedding to a wedding (and family) of their own. They are sweet, funny, and surprisingly good (for a sitcom) at working through issues and talking things out. From the start, these two were clearly going to be perfect together… but that doesn’t mean they didn’t have some bumps in the road.
In fact, although most fans can agree that they are a great couple now, there were certainly moments of wanting to yell ‘dump them!’ at the screen. Lies, manipulations, put downs… these are definitely not all the signs of a healthy relationship (just a sitcom one).
When Chandler Made Fun Of Her Weight
We’re not just talking about when they were young and stupid - they were a long way from together back then! But Chandler continually makes little digs at her throughout the series as adults, from the first time we see her in a home video (and a fat suit), to much later when he calls her ‘just a little fat girl inside’. It’s meant to be funny, but no one should have to put up with a partner who would even care if they were ‘fat’ at one time, let alone take little jabs at them all the time because of it.
When Monica Made Him Lie To Their Friends
Admittedly, this one actually turns into one of their sweeter moments, but the way it starts is just awful. Pheobe hurts Monica’s feelings by telling her that she is ‘high maintenance’ (which is undeniably the truth), and so Monica stomps off and grabs Chandler. She actually coaches him in a speech to give to Pheobe and Rachel, and makes him repeat it verbatim even though he is clearly uncomfortable. That said, he then comforts her, and tells her that it’s ok, because he likes ‘maintaining her’ - which is lovely, but the situation as a whole just isn’t great.
When Chandler Lied To Her About His Allergies
Honesty is the bedrock of a relationship… unless you are Chandler Bing. Chandler is a fan of lying, although it’s usually about smaller, more harmless things. However, when it comes to pets, Chandler made up a deadly medical condition rather than telling the truth - which is a seriously big lie.
He just doesn’t really like dogs, which is fine (if a little unusual), but rather than say that, he claims he has an allergy. It’s a lie that he may have continued their entire lives if Phoebe hadn’t snuck a dog in the apartment and found him out.
When Monica Manipulated Him Into Sex
Monica isn’t exactly the most truthful partner either, though. When the two are trying to have a baby, Monica discovers that Chandler has been smoking again. Ignoring the fact that he is a grown man who can (presumably) decide for himself if he wants to, she becomes furious with him, and they get in a huge fight. However, she’s ovulating at the time, so she pretends to forgive him to trick him into having sex with her… and then after, tells him it was all a lie and she’s still mad.
When Chandler Made Homophobic Jokes
Admittedly, this is a problem with almost every character on the show, but Monica should definitely not accept a relationship with someone who is clearly (even if only a little bit) homophobic. He has massive issues with his father, who is trans and works in Vegas singing for a cabaret. Admittedly, Chandler’s issues with his parents aren’t totally unrealistic, but Monica clearly tries hard to welcome both parents in, and although she isn’t the most sensitive, she tries to be complimentary and use the correct pronouns. Chandler, meanwhile, is just horrible about the whole thing, and she deserves someone more compassionate.
When Monica Demands They Use All His Savings For A Wedding
There are times that fans forget that Chandler definitely makes the most money out of anyone on the show - except possibly Joey at the height of his fame. Monica certainly forgot it when she was upset about her parents spending her wedding fund on a beach house. However, when Chandler revealed to her that he had a solid savings account, she demanded that they spend the entire thing, that he had been saving for years, on their wedding - and had the nerve to get upset with him when he refused!
When Chandler Broke Into Her Closet
Even in a relationship, everyone deserves a little bit of privacy. It wouldn’t be ok for a partner to read someone’s journal, or dig through their drawers… but Chandler clearly doesn’t think this.
When he moves in, he realizes that he has no idea what is in the closet next to the bathroom. Monica asks him to just leave it alone, as it’s private, so of course, he violates that boundary almost instantly, breaking the door off its hinges, and then making fun of her for what he finds.
When Monica Bullies Him
Monica’s controlling nature is played off as a joke in Friends, and all of the characters have their personalities exaggerated for the sake of humor in the show. But there’s no escaping the fact that Monica routinely bullies Chandler - to the point that when he tries to do a nice thing and clean the apartment, he becomes terrified that she will be upset. She does seem to realize that something is wrong, here, and says she doesn’t want him to be scared of her… but she also doesn’t really change.
When Chandler Takes A Job In Tulsa
Major life choices should always be discussed in a partnership, especially when it comes to something as huge as moving to another part of the country. However, Chandler managed to take a job in Tulsa without even talking to his wife. He may not have meant to (he fell asleep in a meeting and didn’t know what he was agreeing to), but he could have spoken to his boss… not just told her that their marriage had to be long distance, even at Christmas and New Year (and at Christmas, he very nearly cheats on her when he’s there, too!).
When Monica Lied About Seeing Richard
Ah, Richard. Monica’s other big love, and a relationship that was deeply problematic… especially when it comes to Chandler’s jealousy. Of course, Chandler may have had reason to be jealous. After Monica met Richard for lunch, she lied about it to Chandler - not exactly the way to help deal with jealousy, if it was really innocent. And after she and Chandler had a fight (when he was trying to fool her into thinking he didn’t want marriage, so his proposal would be a big surprise), she went straight to Richard’s house for comfort. Come on Monica. Move on.
